Scumbag CEO brain parasite

31  2015-09-23 by Pangolinsareodd

So I think we have Martin Shkreli all wrong. The poor guy is actually a victim.

Hear me out.
1.His OK Cupid profile lists Cats as the first thing he couldn't live without.

  1. We all know that you can contract the mind controlling parasite Toxoplasma Gondii from cats.

  2. The drug Daraprim which he has recently made unaffordable, is a treatment for Toxoplasmosis.

Martin Shkreli has clearly contracted Toxoplasma parasites from his beloved cats, and in the same manner that the parasite causes infected rats to suicide in order to breed in cat digestive systems, the parasite is controlling Martin to remove the cure from the market in order that it's parasitic brethren can multiply uninterrupted!

TL;DR Martin Shkreli is a parasite, but not for the reasons reported...

4 comments

All joking aside, this guy is a really good example of how rich people think. His attitude isn't any different from any of his fellow 0.01% friends.

The only real difference here is how open he is about it. Most of them would hide behind a team of "spokespeople" and use spin teams to conceal their naked greed.

Shkreli is being unusually honest... and that's kind of weird.

Solid.

This is great, awesome deduction!

As funny and off the wall as it sounds, there may be a smidgen of truth in there somewhere as the mental effects of human Toxoplasma gondii infection are not fully understood.

From Wikipedia, "A number of studies have suggested subtle behavioral or personality changes may occur in infected humans, and infection with the parasite has recently been associated with a number of neurological disorders..."

12? Or 13?